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When the Dream Turns to Nightmare

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This blog was prompted by the most recent death of an FDNY firefighter and though, there is clear linkage to his presence at the WTC on 9/11, he was not accorded LODD status.

http://www.firefighternation.com/forum/topics/fdny-denies-line-of-duty

It is in a firefighter’s nature to learn with an almost child-like enthusiasm and then to execute with the ferocity of a wild animal. Obstacles don’t exist in our world. Problems are quickly solved. Emergencies are mitigated with precision and professionalism. The only fear is the fear of failure.

For many, the dream started generations ago. Their father, grandfather and great-grandfather served with honor and in the fire services’ highest tradition. The dream came out of the stories that were told and re-told and yes; sometimes embellished. There were stories about gearing up in the cab of the truck, feeling the adrenaline overtake you, the biggest fire, the hottest fire, most unusual fire, harrowing rescues, crawling down smoke-filled hallways, running up several flights of stairs to get above the fire floor, dropping to your bellies as the fire rolls over you like a freight train, holding the knob and directing the water onto the fire, forcing a door, pulling a ceiling looking for fire extension, cutting a vent, taking windows, making a grab and on and on.

Those stories and hanging out at a fire station would pave that road to the dream.

Shift by shift, day in and day out, year after year, firefighters have lived the dream. Many could talk about their close calls, what each incident had taught them, what was successful and not so successful, the many friendships that they had made, the unbreakable bonds to their brother and sister firefighters, the strength of their call to duty and the clarity of their mission. It was all fuel for the dream.

While working at the best job in the world, thoughts were turning to yet, another dream; the dream of retiring to a good pension and the reunions with fellow retirees. Sleep would only be interrupted by a need to urinate or by the occasional barking dog. Every day would be a Kelly day. Family would become the focus after years of playing second fiddle to the job. Your hobby would become a reality as you worked from boxes upon boxes of memories that would become several scrapbooks, dedicated to the many years of your dedication.

And as you come to an end of one dream to start another, you notice that a sore throat hasn’t resolved after several weeks of ignoring it. You see that cut on your shin isn’t healing. Maybe you are experiencing low back pain or a pain in your kidneys for no apparent reason.

Or, you are feeling fine, but you go for a routine check up, only to discover that the doctor wants to order more tests as a precaution. It could be that the colonoscopy showed something; perhaps a polyp. There is a spot on a lung or at least an unusual mass that requires further review. It could be that your urine is darker than normal. Perhaps your white blood cell count is low and you have no history of leukemia in your family.

You go home, thinking about your next shift. It may be time to pay back C shift for changing the padlock on your food locker. There’s new construction going on and it would be a good time to see the building without its skin. It would go nicely with the upcoming building construction class being taught. There’s a new recruit class due to graduate, so lots of activities will be planned to transition the probies into their crews.

The next week goes by pretty unremarkably and then the phone rings. The doctor wants to see you today. The test results are back. No; he doesn’t like to discuss test results over the phone.

You arrive at the office and check in with the desk. You thumb through a two month old People magazine, but it’s just something to do. You aren’t reading or even looking at the photos. You want to get the news; good or bad.

After a 30 minute wait, you are taken to an exam room and told that “Doctor will be with you shortly”. You remember that cell phones are to be turned off while in the doctor’s office, so you grab it and turn it off. You stare at the poster of the human anatomy, realizing that you weren’t too well schooled on the names of certain muscles, joints or bones. You study it as if you will be tested on it. Then the doctor comes in.

He shakes your hand and without so much as an obligatory salutation, he tells you that you have a cancer.

Your dream has just turned into a nightmare.

The doctor is mapping a strategy that you’re not sure is going to kill the disease before it kills you. You discuss it in general, yet optimistic terms. Maybe it’s a cancer that, if caught early, will provide you with a 95% survival chance.

Or, you have one of the more insidious of cancers; pancreatic. Pancreatic cancer, in its early stages, will not illicit noticeable symptoms. By the time you become symptomatic, you have a 10% chance of beating it. That is a nightmare from Hell!

And though you are surrounded by family, friends and fellow firefighters who have sworn to be at your side every step of the way, you are alone with your deep despair and feelings of betrayal towards your God and a profession that you literally have given your life to.

You could almost tolerate the nightmare were it to end with an LODD funeral and benefits paid to your widow.

But, due to faulty logic, bureaucracy, inexact science and a lack of indisputable documentation, you get a firefighter’s funeral and a promise that the fight for benefits will be never-ending.

Consider that; here you are, not knowing if you will live or die and dealing with all of the mortality issues, “planning for the worst, yet hoping for the best”, as they say and you have no guarantees that those you leave behind will continue to pay because of a very flawed system.

Many continue to feel the nightmare of 9/11. They have been affected in ways that we, who were not there, will never fully understand. A nation felt the loss of almost 3,000 Americans on that day; losses that are felt to this day.

But, the sinister effects of that day continues their nightmarish ways, because losses from a variety of illnesses continue to kill FDNY firefighters, NYPD police officers, Port Authority officers and civilians. It is estimated that to date, 800 have died; post 9/11.

If test samples from The Pile were found to contain high levels of known carcinogens, then how can we possibly claim that those who were there and continue to die are not deserving of LODD status and all benefits accordingly?

Why must we perpetuate this act of terror with the fear that, if you die, your honorable place alongside those killed on 9/11 will be but a footnote?

We must end this nightmare so that our 9/11 heroes can truly rest in peace.

And we must do the same for our brothers and sisters across the country that are having their dreams shattered by illnesses that arise out of the performance of their firefighting duties.

TCSS.

The article as submitted is published under The Adventures of Jake and Vinnie© umbrella and is the intellectual property of Art Goodrich a.k.a. ChiefReason. It is protected by federal copyright laws and cannot be re-printed in any form without expressed permission from the author. You may read other works by the author at www.chiefreasonart.com.

Posted by chiefreason on January 1, 2010 • Filed under: My Size Up • Tagged: , , , , ,

Preparing For An LODD

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First Published 3/16/03

 

We have all experienced the loss of a loved one. In some cases, we can remember where we were and what we were doing when we got word. We have been there during the final moments. With others, we have had time to prepare for an impending death. Unpleasant thought that it is, we have found ourselves thinking about what we would do at the time of the passing of a loved one.

 

As family and friends gather before, during and after the funeral, we cope because we draw on each other’s strength. Someone, possibly an elder member of the family, becomes the “gentle hand on the shoulder”; that voice that speaks with the soft re-assurance that we’ll get through this crisis together. We will be better people for having known our lost loved one.

 

But then, while working the scene of a two-story, wood frame family dwelling, the silence of the night is shattered by “Mayday. Mayday. Firefighter down”!

 

You are there and it’s real. No phone call; no time to “prepare”! It’s happening right in front of you and a thousand thoughts are racing through your mind.

 

It is at this point that the incident has turned into a disaster that has become personal.

 

As a company officer, be it chief, assistant chief, captain or lieutenant, we are taught not to dwell on the thought of a firefighter dying while in the line of duty. Whether they die while pulling hose or are caught in a flashover or structural collapse, your emotional state at that moment could cause you to lose control of the scene and therefore, compromise it’s safety.

Just as an officer would prepare his crew for a ventilation exercise, an officer must prepare himself for the emotional upheaval that an LODD will cause at the scene. A systematic approach will get you and your crew backs safely to the station, where additional support in the form of critical incident stress de-briefing (CISD) can be initiated. Until then, incident management should continue, emergency personnel should be closely supervised and control of the scene should be maintained, including crowd control and scene security as the second phase begins: recovery of personnel.

Even with emotions running high, the recovery process must utilize the same considerations of any other rescue operation. Again, closer monitoring of personnel is essential to continued safe operation.

Key considerations are:

1)     It is a crime scene until proven otherwise.

2)     Removing the body(s) or leaving in place.

3)     Accounting for all personnel.

4)     Gaining positive identification of the deceased.

5)     Notifying the family and assigning a department representative to them.

During the investigation of the LODD, it is best to use a third party. This will eliminate any claim of impropriety by community members and even firefighters. So, though you may have the department resource to conduct such an investigation under normal circumstances, consider using outside investigators in conjunction with your state fire marshal, NIOSH, OSHA, ATF, NFPA, NIST, other firefighter organizations and your department’s safety and health officer.

 

All safety equipment that was used and worn at the time of the LODD, such as turnout gear, SCBA, PASS device, etc. should be documented, photographed and placed into a secure container. Further testing and viewing by investigators necessitates limiting its handling by only those personnel involved in the incident.

The autopsy is a very vital phase of the investigation of an LODD, due to the application for death benefits. Information needed from the autopsy is the cause of death, carbon monoxide levels, toxicology and blood alcohol results. In many states, the presence of drugs or alcohol in the system at the time of death may void some death benefits. The Department of the Treasury will require a number of documents when application is made for Public Safety Officer Death Benefits.

 

Because of multiple requests for documents, you may need to secure several original copies or certified copies, depending on the benefits being applied for. Those documents may include death certificate, birth certificate, marriage license, children’s birth certificates (for survivor benefits), notarized letter on official department letterhead from the chief of department stating the facts of the events that caused the firefighter’s death and original medical examiner, toxicology, blood alcohol and investigator’s reports; all requiring original signatures and raised notary seals. You will also want a verification of surviving children who are full time students.

Staffing of the department should be accomplished using mutual aid as the funeral services draw nearer.

 

Fire service funerals are set in deep tradition, but it is important to remember that the wishes of the fallen’s family come first, followed by the fire department and then by the community. Do not force any firefighter traditions onto the family. A detailed explanation of the service protocols may be necessary. The family needs to know and understand that a firefighter funeral is non-traditional when compared to civilian funeral services. Keep everyone informed. Plan in advance for facilities that will accommodate a large crowd. Consider using a civic center, gymnasium, stadium or large church. Contact honor guards as soon as a firefighter funeral has been decided.

 

Returning to normal operations should be done as soon as possible. Most firefighters want to reclaim their territory-i.e. firehouse-as soon as they can. Let them get back to their routine.

 

Memorial funds will need to be established soon after the incident. Contact your local bank and a tax specialist to determine what is best when establishing the fund.

 

It is my sincerest hope that you never experience the loss of a fellow firefighter, but if you do, then the steps that I have outlined here will hopefully lessen the impact of the unknowns.

 

Post Script

By now, many of you are probably wondering where I would get such a detailed plan. It came from a discussion group that was lead by Chief Mark Wessels of Keokuk, Iowa and held last year in East Peoria.

 

On the morning of December 22, 1999 and just two weeks after Worcester, MA lost six firefighters in a warehouse fire, Chief Wessels lost three of his own, including his assistant chief who was also his best friend, to a structural fire that also claimed the lives of three children. The structure flashed over, causing the deaths of the three firefighters. The firefighters had removed two children and were going back for the third child when the flashover occurred.

 

At the memorial service held at the high school gymnasium, I was struck by the composure of Chief Wessels as he eulogized his three men. He did so with the widows and children of the fallen heroes sitting directly in front of him. I was so moved by his strength under such extraordinary circumstances that I came home and wrote him a letter.

 

When I saw him last year, he spoke very openly of the whole experience; from the time the call came in until the final reports were issued. He described the five steps of grieving that he and his entire department went through. He talked about his clash with his city’s mayor. He discussed the relentless investigation by the Iowa Occupational Safety and Health Administration. During the entire time, he also had a fire department to run; a department that was very short of manpower. He described the anger of some citizens who were upset because “firefighters took over their town and their memorial service”. He had to appease some national organizations that felt “slighted” at the funeral. He relived the day and the anger over manpower constraints. On the day of the incident, the department had to split their resources for a MVA and minutes later, the house fire.

 

His fire department, though grateful for all of the help, was now growing angry from what they felt were “intrusions”. It was then that Chief Wessels knew that it was time to thank everyone for their help and to send them on their way.

 

At the end of our discussion, I had a question that was weighing very heavily upon me. So I asked him.

 

“How many did you lose off of your department after this horrific chain of events?”

 

He looked at me with a grin and said “Not one!”

 

And that is a testament to the strength and the spirit of the Brotherhood!

 

Take care and stay safe.

 

The article as submitted is published under The Adventures of Jake and Vinnie© umbrella and is the intellectual property of Art Goodrich a.k.a. xchief22 and ChiefReason. It is protected by federal copyright laws and cannot be re-printed in any form without expressed permission from the author.

Posted by chiefreason on January 18, 2009 • Filed under: My Size Up • Tagged: , , , ,